Singleness = Freedom


A belated Happy 4th of July to all my fellow Americans!

Thinking about the freedom and liberty we enjoy as citizens of the United States of America also got me ruminating a bit about the advantages and freedoms afforded by the single life.

Do What You Want

Being single means freedom – the freedom to do what you want when you want to do it. Your time and your money are yours to spend in any way you choose. It means not having to answer to someone else. It means not having to yield the TV remote to another person. Singleness means freedom from judgmental eyes when you eat ice cream straight out of the carton. It means when you are not at work your schedule is your schedule.

One day, according to statistics, if you so desire, you will, more likely than not, marry someone. Along with all the wonderful things that marriage brings, companionship, intimacy, sex, shared responsibilities, also comes accountability.

What you do will more often than not be a joint decision, a collaboration between you and your spouse. Some of your decisions will be made together as a couple. Other decisions you make will be influenced by your spouse. Not that they will necessarily be manipulative or demanding, it may just be your desire to please them, or their subtle influence on your way of thinking. Either way, your decisions will then derive more from the collective you and less from the single you.

That is not necessarily a bad thing, but it means that you should be thankful for and take full advantage of the freedom you enjoy now as a single person. So go ahead, wear that shirt your future spouse will probably hate. Eat the stuff your ex thought was gross. Listen to that obscure band your future special someone may not appreciate.

Actually, who knows? While out doing what you want you may find yourself in the company of someone else who enjoys doing that same thing.

Be What You Want

But your freedom does not end there. You have the power to decide who and what you want to be. This is America. You are single. You decide what you believe, what you stand for, what you enjoy, and what you want to make of your life.

Your only limits are your talent and your imagination. Go. Do. Become – while the choice is totally yours.

That is not to say that you entirely give up being what you want when you get married. It could limit your options though, especially if children are involved. If you marry well though, it could open up even more possibilities you never thought about.

But, that is in the future. Who knows what the future holds? As for now, take full advantage of your singleness. Become the person you want to be. That is your right. It is your choice alone. Use that freedom judiciously, but for God sake, use it!

And here again, who knows, while exercising the freedom your singleness provides you may become the person who is incredibly attractive to the person you want to spend the rest of your life with.


I do have one word of caution though. With freedom comes responsibility. You alone are responsible both for what you do and for who you become.  You alone will bear the consequences, good or bad, of your decisions. So, use your freedom judiciously. Use it wisely. But, like I said earlier, for God sake, use it!


Right now, as a single person, you have freedom. See these years as an opportunity. Hopefully, this is a one-time shot. Make it count!

Are you making the most of your singleness? How? Let everyone know in the comments.

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