Valentine’s Day? – Not a Fan
Valentine’s Day was one of the hardest days for me as a single person. Not only was I living alone, but had I remained married, it would have been my anniversary. So yeah, it was not my favorite day.
There were very few things people could say to me to make it better. The thing is, it is a day which celebrates romantic love. And even though my life was filled with love, that was the love I intensely craved and the love I did not have.
Agape, Philia, Storge, Eros
I had the agape love of God, along with agape and plenty of philia and storge love from my children, parents, friends, acquaintances, family, and church family. The thing that was missing was the very thing this day celebrates – eros.
What Did Help
Even though I have been there and lived to tell, and have hopefully earned some sway with those of you who read my blog, I could never presume to tell you how you should feel or not feel on this day. But, I can tell you what did help me.
The thing that did help me was to be thankful and to be grateful – thankful and grateful for the love I did have in my life. Having the love of God, parents, children, friends, and church family is no small matter. In fact, in many ways, those loves are more deep and fulfilling than romantic love could ever be.
Eros > Agape, Philia, and Storge?
I would go so far as to say that if forced to choose, whether to have the love I did have or the love I desperately wanted, it would have been an almost impossible choice. But in the end, I believe I would have chosen the love I already had.
As wonderful as eros is, it is not the be-all and end-all of our existence. Is it great to have and worth seeking after? Absolutely! Is it greater than all other loves? Absolutely not!
With that in mind, you have a choice on Valentine’s Day – choose to celebrate what you have or mourn what you do not have. The good news is that this choice is not mutually exclusive. It is okay to spend a little time lamenting love lost or romantic love never realized. However, may I suggest that you spend a greater amount of time enjoying and being grateful and thankful for the love you do have.
Someone you know needs to read this and needs to know about Thrive Singles Blog – pass it on.
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